I recognized him in that dark lighting

I kind of hate going to Therapy for a number of reasons, but one of them is that someone always gets screwed with the seating.  It’s always packed for Cattle Call, especially since Peppermint started hosting.  But I was itching to go out (especially after working long hours in preparation for holiday time off), and most of the Crew had migrated from a certain Ivy League school's HoliGay party to the aforementioned bar, which is right around the corner from my office.  I managed to grab a seat with TTT and his crew, but unfortunately Bottomless Pitt and Urban Sprawl were the ones to get screwed. 

One of the performers had an amazingly intricate drag costume.  As soon as she walked out, MicHELLe IDed her as the singer from The Fifth Element.  Another drag queen literally hit me in the face with a fist full of glitter.  Um, hair?  By the time the show was done and we had danced to “Get Me Bodied” and “Single Ladies”, it was almost 1am!  Fuck.

Thursday, I had a party with work people where I got pretty damn bombed (it was open bar!), and I met up with the Ivy League Crew at View.  After my second frozen cosmo, I was ready to migrate, but Bottomless Pitt said to me out of the side of her mouth, “I’m getting us free drinks.”  I don’t know who was the recipient of that quick handjob, but 10 seconds later, I had a margarita.  Wooorrrrrrrrrk!

PS, I think the DJ at View has been playing not-so-hot pop music specifically because he thinks we get way too rowdy when songs we like come on.  Oops.

By the time we got to Splash, I was lit!  Actin’ up, but no more drank in my cup.  Who should walk by but a German that I met about a month before (in the exact same spot)!  Really, the only reason I recognized him in that dark lighting is because he has great pecs and he had his shirt pulled up in the same ridiculous way that he did before.  Let’s call him Litre-hosen.  Because at 6’4” and 220 lbs of muscle, he’s a tall drink of vodka water.  The first time we met, we flirted heavily and danced together for a while.  At the end of the night, he walked me to the subway and I barely got a kiss goodnight (which was kind of okay because he smokes).

Aside: if you think it may be funny to bite someone in the neck that you haven’t yet hooked up with, it’s probably the alcohol talking.  Then again, I’m still giggling as I’m typing this totally sober (okay, hung over).

Now, many of you who don’t know me have no idea where I stand on smoking.  I’d rather legalize coke because you don’t make my clothes smell bad when you do it.  Nor do you give me cancer from second-hand blow.  I’ve even said “I’d never date a smoker,” but that may or may not be true.  People say the same thing about black guys, so I guess I should cut some slack (I do see the logical fallacy in that analogy, but just go with it). 

Using my drunken logic, I figure if I let Litre-hosen go smoke by himself, he’ll “be right back” (i.e., I wouldn’t see him for the rest of the night).  Forget that I have his number.  Or that we’ve met before.  Or that I don’t pursue smokers!  He’s outside in his tank top, and I’m wearing his Ivy-League hoodie (he's in a PhD program).  He smells strange, but in a good way.  Definitely not like smoke.

I’ve probably done something almost as senseless as voluntarily standing in the cold for a craving (maybe drinking beer to get drunk?) but not that I recall.  Oh, right.  That time I voluntarily stood outside in the cold with a guy I wanted to hook up with while he smoked.  Fuck.

How did my night end?

“So I think I should be going.”  Mm, German accent.

“Cool.  Shall I go with you?”

*Look of shock* “We haven’t gone on a proper date yet!”

“Proper date?  This doesn’t count?”  How bout a popper date.

“I’ll walk you to the train.”

“Thanks.”  And by thanks, I mean, 'How very dare you!'

Meanwhile, it’s 3am.  I had abandoned my friends like 2 hours before, and I had work the next day.  Did I mention I just got rejected by a smoker whom I'd barely talked to?  (Did I mention he was hot?)  Yeah (whatever... but maybe there's more to this guy than meets the eye).

To read about us gawking at Gayrotic Sexpo hotness, click here.

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