#TuesdayTweetup (Real men. Real booze. Real trouble.)

image from @BubbleJock's Twitter

On Tuesdays, I usually meet up with a few guys that I know through Twitter for our #TuesdayTweetup. It all started a few months ago when I started following this white guy with a fat ass called @BubbleJock (class of ‘94ish). I was looking through his timeline, which included quite a few butt and body shots. But one of the pics from a few days prior included a face. @BubbleJock was cute! Not to mention flirty. So when he mentioned a low-pressure opportunity to meet in person, it was a no-brainer.

After the gym, I showed up to Gym Bar and tweeted upon my arrival. Gym Bar does this weird thing where they only honor 2-4-1 tokens until about 15 min after the 2-4-1 special ends, so when I arrived at 8:45, my drink was my priority. I didn’t really recognize anyone, so I went digging through my phone for that face pic @BubbleJock had posted on Twitter. See, I didn’t really study his facial features so much as mentally place him on the hot ladder and move on. Luckily, when I looked up, @BubbleJock was standing with a group of guys, waving at me.

At one point, the conversation veered towards @BubbleJock and his low tolerance for alcohol. Apparently our Tweetups are the only time he really drinks, so by the time he finishes his 2-4-1, he’s pretty drunk. One time, he found a short guy to start talking to (he’s a total bottom until he meets a "pocket gay"), and he ended up picking this guy up by the waist and “shaking him like a salt shaker.” It’s become a running gag at the Tweetups.

There are a few regulars that come every week with a few people that say they’ll come end up flaking. I’d gotten into the habit of recovering from the weekend on Monday and meeting up with Grrber on Tuesdays, so I kept having to leave the Tweetup early. One week, I finally decided to give Grrber the boot so I could really hang out. By this time, @RugbyCub, a bearish white guy (class of ‘08ish) had started working at Boxers, a new gay sports bar, so we'd moved the Tweetup there.

image from boxersnyc.com

When arrived at Boxers, @Coz (pocket-sized, shaved-headed white actor with a day job, class of ‘06ish... that's not his actual Twitter screenname, btw) was already nursing his second free beer from the bartender that had a crush on him. I greeted and headed to the bar for a screwdriver (splash of grapefruit). Boxers’ bartenders are all quite attractive, and on Tuesdays, they cover quite a few demographics. There’s a tall, white muscle-bear, a younger, slimmer white guy, built Latin guy, a few barbacks of various builds, heights, and ethnic makeups. I managed to order a drink from the built black guy with Tyson Beckford-like eyes without drooling on my shirt, and as he was giving me change, he asked, “Hey, what’s your name again?” This totally meant that he remembered our previous brief encounter! I’m not exactly sure if that was the previous Tuesday or before (because I definitely recognized him from before the bar opened), but we’d actually had enough interaction to elicit my name!

Me (without stuttering): “D. Kareem.”

Him: “Oh, right. ‘Cause you do the, uh, the black…”

Me (without staring at his perky nipples): “The Blackout Blog, yeah. What’s your name again?”

image from @BubbleJock's TwitPic

I skipped back over to where our group of Tweeters had settled. A bunch of older guys had walked in and settled not too far from us. @BubbleJock had his eye on this short, dark-skinned guy in his 40s, whom he eventually lured over. The guy’s friend started talking to @Coz. I struck up a conversation with a tall gentleman and his Southern friend, who was wearing a seersucker blazer.

Twenty minutes later, I looked over, and @BubbleJock and @Coz had switched guys. One guy had his hand down the back of @BubbleJock’s pants, and the other looked like he was going to suck @Coz’s face off! @RugbyCub and I exchanged a look and laughed.

After making out with this guy for about a half hour, @Coz left alone. Apparently, the guy’s age (and his four kids) were a bit much to handle for a hookup… but not enough to deter a make-out session that disqualified the guy from picking up anyone else at the bar. Anyway, @BubbleJock and I talked to the two guys for a while, and @Coz’s guy revealed that he was really into @Coz. So much so that he pulled out the card @Coz had given him and emailed @Coz on his Blackberry 10 minutes after he'd left. @Coz later told me the guy sent him a second email once got home. @Coz eventually told the guy that he wasn’t interested. I guess you can text-message breakup.

Did I mention that I'm on Twitter (and that you should follow me... click here for my profile)? Yeah.

Click here to check out a ridiculous trip to Fire Island ("a lot of hot tubs out here have a no-fabric rule").