Nightlife master and crowned King of NYC Queer Sleaze Daniel Nardicio had some awesome advice in his weekly newsletter (shoot him a message at firstname.lastname@example.org to join the list). I couldn't have said this better myself. He's agreed to let me share it with you here, so enjoy!
This week I place my tongue firmly in cheek to report on a question I get all the time:
"Daniel, you lead such a fun life, but how do you surround yourself with all these hot guys??"
Ok, it's true, I'm not exactly Ridge...
But lets face it- most of us arent. But I do believe you can get with a cute guy no matter what you look like.
So, in the spirit of Autumn, I've decided to jot down my...
10 Rules for How to Get a Hot Guy!
Let's face it— men are visual. We work off visual clues and aspire to bed creatures with these visual clues. But most of us aren't blessed genetically— in fact the opposite. Many people have commented on why I am surrounded by so many good looking guys. Yes some of them are on my staff (I JUST realized how sexual that sounds!). But mostly its because I've mastered the art of bagging hot guys.
I could make millions off these tips, but I've decided to give them FREE to you, my dear readers.
10 tips on how an average guy can get a hot guy.
1.) Never tell them how good looking they are. It's boring, they probably already know, and you'd never go up to a rich person and say: "You have so much money!!" Instead be charming, funny and approach them as if you are on their level.
2.) If they used to be fat, glance occaisionally at their mid section disapprovingly but NEVER say anything. This is just a move to make if they are starting to give attitude. And these are virtual gold mines— I firmly believe if you can bag an ex-fat guy it's the holy grail because they are so appreciative in bed!
3.) Keep all your fair weather friends away from them. This is especially true on Fire Island~ a girlfriend is a girlfriend, but put some drinks in them and they'll throw you overboard faster than you can say "Angelina Jolie!"
4.) Pretend he's smart. Even if he's not, just pretend he is— it's easier. Plus I've learned throughout the years: smart guys think they're dumb often, and sadly, dumb guys think they are smart.
5.) Treat him like a prince in bed. 'nuff said.
6.) Listen- this is a general rule all around.
7.) Act interested in anything he finds interesting.
8.) Don't pay for anything. If you want a hooker, go to rentboy.com.
(If you start by buying drinks and paying for things, you will quickly become "that guy"— the cash cow.)
9.) Repeat after me: "Hot guys are like buses— wait 5 minutes and another one will come." Don't be desperate. If a guy gives you the brush off, move on. If he's rude (which happens in the Pines) try this line: "Why not lower your standards— I did!" Try to snap a pic of their face when you say this and send it to me!
10.) If I'm heading into a shark tank (a room full of hot guys) I decide to, erm, take matters into my own hands before I go. In other words, don't go there horny) we've all made stupid decisions when revved up, and the best advice I can give you is- if you go into the shark tank with no agenda , you can work the room like a calm sexy self assured guy you are.
Check out Daniel's website danielnardicio.com to get the latest updates on his insane parties on Fire Island (yes, still) and in the City.
Looking for more advice? Click here check out TheBlackoutBlog's Top 11 Online Dating and Hookup Tips.