In the spirit of one of my favorite blogs, Douchebags of Grindr, allow me to present a simple game, Douche Spotting: The Grindr Game, based on the types of douches you're sure to encounter on Grindr, a "social networking" app for gay men that tells you how far the nearest
masc, chill, VGL bro guy is from you. You want to get as many points as possible in 24 hours (keep track with screenshots). Tally your points and find your ranking at the bottom of the post.
The Punny Douche
|5 points. 2 extra points if he makes an unoriginal pun based on his race!|
The Holier-Than-Thou Douch
|2 points. 3 extra points if he propositions you. 5 extra points if he sends you a dirty pic.|
The Duck-Lips Douche
|3 points. 3 extra points if he's clearly over 30.|
The I'm-Too-Sexy Douche
|4 points. 3 extra points if he sends you additional photos from the same carefully-orchestrated (in his mind) photo shoot.|
The TV-Quote Douche
|2 points. 2 extra points if it's from a show on a broadcast network (ABC/CBS/etc.)|
The Age-Lying Douche
|1 point. 1 extra point if he claims 28, 29 or 30 (where most 'young' guys cut off their age filter).|
The Sarcastic Douche
|2 points. 5 extra points if you thought he was being sarcastic, but he's actually serious.|
Wet Rag (0-29 points)*
Dude, come on! Half the fun of Grindr is laughing at the ridiculousness you see in peoples profiles! Go ahead and download Grindr Xtra so you can expand your douchey view.
Douche Hunter (30-49 points)*
Oh, you're spotting some douches alright! Keep hitting that "Load More Guys" button, though. There are more douches out there!
Douche Magnet (50-69 points)*
Man! Not only are you finding these douches, you're talking to them. Admit it, you started the conversation to get points, didn't you.
Douchemeister (70 or more points)*
You've got the keenest eye for the douchebags. And you're battery is probably about to die.
Play along and post your rankings in the comments. And include a link (Instagram, TwitPic, etc.) to your best screenshots. If I get a critical mass, I'll make a Facebook gallery of douchiness!
Also, did I miss any Grindr Douche types? Leave them in the comments.
Click here for more Fun with Grindr.