RECAPTION: Ru Paul's Drag Race Season 5, Ep 6

The queens opened this week's show saying goodbye to Lineysha and jumping right into the mini-challenge: doing their makeup in the dark while Ru Paul kept watch with night-vision goggles. During the challenge, it became pretty clear who does the best impression of Alyssa.

"pretty sure she's making this face"

When the lights came back up the, queens looked pretty much a hot mess! I really adore Alaska for just saying “Fuck it!” with her makeup job and going for the laugh! Even on the teeth, girl! But Detox walked away with the win for this challenge. 

For the main challenge, they had to write and record an inspirational song, “Can I Get an Amen.” And in the tradition of benefit songs like “We Are the World”, the queens had to give throwback realness for the filming of the video in the studio with Ru’s producer Lucian Piane. As mini-champion, Detox got to pick the songwriting teams.

Team 1 (bridge): Ro-Laska-Tox

Team 2 (verse 2): Jade Ivy and Jinkx

Team 3 (verse 1): Coco and Alyssa (oo, shade!)

And Detox was totally fucking with Coco and Alyssa.

they call her iCunt for a reason.

Coco was pissed, and that seemed to take a huge toll on her and Alyssa’s composition process for the 1^st verse. She seemed to have a tantrum just over the fact that she was placed on Alyssa’s team before Alyssa even had a chance to piss her off. Alyssa was eager to make it funny since she couldn’t sing, and Ru advised them to revise their lyrics and “put some fun in there!” On the 2^nd-Verse team, Jinkx and Ivy were clearly the most musical. They immediately started harmonizing, and they completely synched on lyrics. Jade, however, was clearly struggling to mix with their chemistry. The Bridge team seemed to be having the best of kikis, but Alaska, as the only one in the clique who hadn’t won a challenge, was over Detox and Roxxxy’s fun and games. 

one of these groups is not like the other...

 

In the studio, the girls showed up in their 80s garb to record the video. When Lucian mentioned that Coco had a lot of pressure on her to start out the song, she got all touchy saying, “Thanks, Detox.” When Detox and Lucian asked her what was going on, Coco brushed them off. Lucian criticized Jade for her lack of confidence while recording, but he loved Ivy’s energy and harmonies. Meanwhile, Jinkx pulled a brilliant steal-the-spotlight move by belting a sustained note over the last chorus during her ad-lib take.

Now, Miss Alaska, you won my heart and pissed me off all within a minute of footage.

   This photo right here sums up why Alaska is possibly my favorite queen this season (though not my pick to win).

And then she had to go and say this…

How dare you throw dirt at my girl Kelly Rowland! This rant could be a whole ‘nother blog post, but Kelly (another avid reader of TheBlackoutBlog), I got your back, gurl!

Speaking of queens wasting valuable oxygen, Roxxxy Andrews got called out during recording for a bit of a vocabulary lapse. 

bet she thought "sequential order" referred a group of voguing monks.

  

She had been under the impression that "sequence" was one sequin and "sequenced" was more than one. 

*blank stare into the camera*

Back in the workroom, Coco and Alyssa were whispering about how Coco felt Detox was making things harder for her by pairing her with Alyssa and instigating drama in the recording session. Detox overheard, and when she confronted Coco, Coco deflected. Alyssa then told Detox that Coco felt like Detox was instigating conflict. Detox declared that she wasn’t trying to sabotage anyone. Coco kept running her mouth under her breath, “I ain’t said a word; I’m just standing here”. Roxxxy jumped in to point this out, and Coco accused them of ganging up on her.

Coco, darling, it’s a competition. If someone has a fair chance to set you up, they’re going to do it. Ru already told you to suck it up and keep moving! And Detox, honey, you knew exactly what you were doing when you put Coco with Alyssa and gave them the first verse. Your saying you weren’t trying to sabotage Coco is like all those Manhunt profiles that say, “No Asians... but I'm not a racist.” Chile, bye!

The queens moved on to prepare for Elimination Day, and their runway assignment was to show off their favorite body part. As they prepared their looks, Detox explained to Alaska all the work she had done on her face and body:

• hips

• ass

• pecs

• under the eyes

• brow

• abs

• cheeks

• lips

• chin

• jaw line

• shoulders

• biceps

have you met my cruise buddy Justin Jedlica? tupperware convention!

When I saw Detox as a boy at the Drag Race premiere event at Boxers HK in NYC, I had to wonder, when I tweeted about her nice body, if she’d gotten work done below the neck. Guess that answers my question.

   For the runway, my top honors go to Ivy Winters (she made a dress out of photos of her face!); Roxxxy (that reveal was everything, and I can’t get enough of her body); and Detox (her face was beat for the gods… and I’m an ass man). 

Detox’s look totally showed off her ass. Click here to check out the back of her sickening dress on my Instagram account.

In the final edit of the video, they managed not to embarrass anyone too badly. Coco’s energy level was just dead. Alyssa sounded bad, but at least she had some facial expressions. The second verse stepped it up: Ivy’s look and vocals were great, and the power of Jinkx vocals led into the bridge perfectly. Alaska had the best vocals on the bridge, and I thought her 80s look topped everyone else’s. Ro-Laska-Tox was easily the group that was most entertaining and energetic, capturing the feel of an 80s benefit song perfectly. Roxxxy’s “where my people at” was absolutely adorable. 

   What did Lucian think of RoLaskaTox's bridge? 

yo yo yo! chill son!

 
   They’re selling the single on iTunes, and part of the proceeds go to the LA Gay and Lesbian Center’s Homless Youth Services.

I wanted to see if Logo's website had the video so that I could post it, but I found this instead. And Logo was dead wrong for putting it on the Internet.

Watch RuPaul's Drag Race Full Episodes - RuPaul - Logo TV

Luckily, World of Wonder posted it on their YouTube channel.

When it came time for the judges’ critique, they weren’t really feeling Coco on the video or the runway. When they asked how it was working with Alyssa, she immediately turned the focus to Detox’s maliciously pairing her with Alyssa. Detox, wisely turned the focus back to Coco, denying the accusation and saying sympathetically that she thought Coco got too in her head during the challenge. Ivy got nothing but accolades from the judges. Guest judge Latoya Jackson loved Jinkx’s sustained note at the end. 

Michelle was all sour grapes this week! First she didn’t like Jade’s outfit with the hair (fair), then she read Jinkx’s contouring on the video, and she said Detox relied on her horizontal lip bobble too much. She really read Alaska, saying she was bored with her and that she was holding back (Ru followed up saying that she wanted to see more vulnerability, which is a critique I’ve never understood on Drag Race). Michelle even gave Ro-Laska-Tox shit for their becoming friends! Rude!

"NO [FRIENDS]!"

A foreboding quote about Alaska came from LaToya: “I think she’s given us all she has.” I truly hope Alaska can prove her wrong.

And just before breaking for commercial, the judges, including the two remaining Pointer Sisters, gave us one last round of “Can I Get an Amen” in beautiful harmony with comic ad-libs.

nice bass voice, Santino!

The winner of the challenge was Ivy Winters, and Jade Jolie had to lip-sync against Coco. Jade’s awkward, gangly movements were no match for Coco’s over-the-top energy, and her friend Coco sent her home.

On Untucked, Ivy walked into the Interior Illusions lounge and realized she couldn’t sit down in her dress. So she stood. The whole time.

Jade was very accepting of the fact that she’d probably be in the bottom two, noting that non-singers like Alyssa were still able to be fun on camera. To make Jade feel better, Detox threw out, “And Alyssa’s fat!” They all had a good kiki over that. 

In footage that didn't make the main episode, Ru asked Alyssa about working with Coco on the runway. Alyssa admitted that Coco was “a little distant.” Coco confronted Alyssa over her not having said anything about this to Coco during the challenge. The next scene was a flashback to the workroom after the recording session where Alyssa was checking in with Coco, saying “You looked like you were about to go off… I think you were unfocused going into it”, and Coco brushing her off with, “It’s all good!” And remember how she was huffing and puffing when she and Alyssa were first trying to get their verse written? Alyssa hadn’t even done anything! Coco was that angry at the mere idea of being paired with Alyssa, and it was obviously affecting their teamwork. So then Coco shifted to say that she didn’t like that Alyssa answered Ru’s question honestly: “You can make me look like whatever you wanna make me look like. I know who I am.”

daggers, honey!

I love your style, Miss Montrese, but have a seat. And while we're talking about style, can we please replace the trucker hat in your interview with a fitted so we can't look through and see the top of your head and the 3 extra inches of empty space above it?

fa real tho.

Meanwhile, Alaska was convinced that this would be her last night on Drag Race. The judges’ critiques that she wasn't showing enough vulnerability and depth moved her to tears.

The queens moved to the Gold Bar where Alyssa received her dad’s video message where he gave her a tearful apology for being cruel to her for being gay. It had been over 20 years since Alyssa had had a conversation with her father. Most of the queens in the room were moved to tears, especially Coco, whose father is dead. Coco encouraged Alyssa to forgive her father before it was too late.

"not ashamed to say my son is gay."

Detox, Jinkx, Coco and Ivy stepped into the Gold Bar, and Coco’s behavior was the next topic of conversation. Detox told Coco that she wished they would have talked about the issue before they went into the challenge. Why? So she could feel less guilty for stacking the cards against Coco? Again, she was within her right, but she knew exactly what she was doing.

When Coco asked if the other girls thought she was acting unprofessionally, they all agreed emphatically that she was, to use Jinkx words, “flat out unprofessional”, especially when she brought her negative energy into the studio with the group and Lucian. And in the Interior Illusions Lounge, the other ladies had a similar conversation, stating that “this isn’t Ru Paul’s School for Girls.”

And when Coco said that she “wasn’t trying to be unprofessional”, Jinkx had this reaction.

edited in from an unrelated moment? likely, but it's still amazing.

   After Coco's referring Jinkx as "hot garbage", I can't wait to see what happens between these two!

Now, if you haven’t been keeping track of the winners, losers and lip-synchers for each challenge, fret not! I’ve created a nifty chart to help you follow along!

According to challenge wins and lip-synchs, it looks like Roxxxy, Alyssa, Jinkx and Ivy are tied for first place. Detox has a win and has had to lip-sync, and Alaska’s done neither. Coco has no wins and 2 lip-syncs. Now that the queens are down to the top half, who are your picks for top 3? Who’s going home next?

And who (if anyone) do you think Ru will bring back in the next couple of episodes? Leave your answers in the comments section!

Memorable Quotes:

“I don’t know if I’ma be able to take it to church. I may take it down the street to the Jack in the Box.” –Alyssa Edwards

“I’m like walking Tupperware, girl!” –Detox

“How do I feel about queens who’ve had plastic surgery: jealous!” –Alaska

“Alyssa, your singing proves that you’re an amazing dancer.” –Ru Paul

Click here to check out my Recaption of Ep 5.5.